Theories...

Guys, I have a theory.

It's a silver lining theory.

About depression.

I think that after you start to recover from the numb stage... the part where you feel absolutely nothing for anyone or anything... you start to feel things more intensely when you DO feel. Maybe that's because you haven't felt in so long that it's overwhelming. But yeah. When you're happy, you cherish it more. When you see and feel beauty and awe, it is so much more vibrant.

I'm always glad to see those I know who struggle with depression say they're having a good day, or how beautiful the weather is. Because I know they're getting their feelings back. And while, yes, the negative feelings hurt even more than ever before, the positive ones shine brighter than ever as well. I want everyone to experience the brightness that comes with one positive and beautiful moment in their life at least once.

Speaking of beauty, I got an issue of Vogue Knitting. Needless to say... I'm hooked. I'm dying for a subscription! All the patterns are just GORGEOUS, and there's something for every skill level. They even have little articles that make you smarter! How fun is that?! I'm very excited for these future projects.

I'm also excited because I am now a Mary Kay Independent Beauty Consultant!! :-D I know this opportunity is going to take me places. I also know that I want to earn a car! Haha. But, seriously. I would love that. I will be working my booty off to reach so many new goals and heights. And I finally have reasons to dress super classy and buy nice shoes ;) heehee. Can we just skip director in qualifying and go straight to Director? I don't like wearing red... but I can handle gold just fine... haha. But, yeah! Really looking forward to beginning this journey. And I love that I'll be able to take it to school with me, too. Although I'm starting to not really want to go to school... But that's probably just me being weird with my feelings again. I never know what I want much anymore. Oh, well! It's an adventure nonetheless. :)

-Natalie